On January 2, 2020 we presented the first part of Why I run…. Now part 2 is here and ready to be shared. We support the process of thorough healing. Becoming open to receive the information, intuitive lead, voiced observation taken as a criticism to bring us to a place of awareness. Awareness then permits the acknowledgment of where we are in that space which brings us to a place of making a clear decision on how to move. The movement to advance or the movement to retreat back into the habit of old. As we share part two with you remember to show compassion to yourself as you go thru your process.
Without further ado Why I run…Part 2 🥁 🥁 🪘
As we have discussed here before, for the past year or so, on our daily prayer calls we have been working on claiming ownership in all aspects of our lives. From the thoughts we think, to the words we speak, to our self love practices, to how we are showing up for ourselves in our inner and outer worlds; ownership has been a consistent theme woven into our daily experiences. As I go deeper in my commitment to showing up for myself in this way I have become more and more curious about who God has created me to be. 💚🌹🎉The practice of ownership has enriched and enhanced my life in ways I could not have ever imagined. Uncovering more of who I am has brought a sense of peace and steadiness into my daily existence that I have not ever experienced before.
This curiosity has led to very interesting discoveries and has provided greater insight into who I am. My participation in ownership has allowed me the space to begin to heal the root causes of one of the most prevelant and pronounced mechanisms of survival that I had built into the fabric of my life. I have referred to this in earlier posts as the “perpetual running” that had become pervasive throughout all aspects of my life. Running in the sense that I would tap out on myself and others when things began to look to be what I had deemed “too much.”
A patterning of behaviors, thoughts and ways of being stemming from when my nervous system had gone through traumas that had not been addressed in the moments they occurred. The pain of the trauma took root and structures were erected around the pain so as not to have to get too close to it. Even though some of these incidences occurred many decades ago it was only until recently through the work of this ownership practice that I felt ready and willing to address the root causes of the running and truly do the work required in order to heal. This work demands committed conviction and asks that you be fully present for the healing process. I realize now this perpetual running came at a great cost, because I wasn’t just running from the pain, I was actually running from myself.