Begrudging or Gracious Giver

I wonder how often I’ve deliberately negated myself to fulfill the needs or requests of someone else. 🧐 I also wonder how that decision has supported me being a habitual self negligent individual. Aware that from a title holding position: Mother, wife, dear friend, sister, daughter, clinician, entrepreneur… it makes carnal conscious sense to make those types of calls. However from a position of practicing self love that emulates the love of God for me, it does not equate to making sense.

Considering the definition of love using 1 Corinthians chapter 13 I could position myself as a martyr to suffer long and remaining hopeful that somehow someway others will reciprocate myself neglect for their own.🤯 Although that would mean I would totally misinform myself to the meaning of that text. Now let me consider the love of God which is unconditional and an unapologetic force. I realize that God’s love is the first love all of us have been exposed to receiving . I feel more steady in that acknowledgment so I draw from it and apply that love to myself. 🥳

Through a shift in acknowledgement of where to begin, in this case, it is at the beginning🤩 taking cues and emulating God’s love for me towards me. Making the love of God my plan to follow and execute supports more easeful access to being flexible. This support gives me opportunities to see and hear more in the now ways to honor the love 💗 which has always been steadily here. Practicing this love that doesn’t scorn me but meets me right where I am in the moment. A practice of being allowing of myself and where I am without neglecting my needs. 🥰 This is a different place from which I give and share myself with others not supportive of self neglect to “show- up” for others. Engaged and thriving in the power of practicing this all inclusive love that makes service to others an exercise of giving and receiving blessings simultaneously🥳.

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